


Something Different

by boundean



Series: collection of my short tumblr fics [4]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Fluff, M/M, short fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-08
Updated: 2015-09-08
Packaged: 2018-04-19 17:19:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 410
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4754678
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/boundean/pseuds/boundean
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean finally realises he deserves something.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Something Different

It’s never been like this. The feeling. It’s like your heart leaps, crashing relentlessly into the walls of your chest that surrounds it. Contains it. It’s something different to Dean. Completely new. 

Of course it’s hard to find the time to search for that certain spark. The one that has your heart beating a million miles an hour, your stomach fluttering with butterflies you’re sure you shouldn’t be feeling. It’s hard as it is for the average person let alone Dean. The hunting, the constant moving around… his chances at finding that were limited to none to begin with.

He didn't  _want_ to want it. He didn't wantto give that person a shitty life.

But he needs it. As much as he hates to admit it, he needs it to keep him sane. So he doesn’t become those things he hunts. Those monsters. He’s not like that and he doesn’t ever want to be. Then again the universe hasn’t given a damn what he wants since before he was born so why should it start now?

All he’s felt up to this point is grief and guilt and overwhelming sadness. He was drowning. The last thing he wanted was to find that  _feeling_. Yet here he is. The web of all his self-deceit and reasoning quickly unraveling at the sight of blue eyes and messy dark hair. It floored him. All this time of repressing what he wanted, repressing what he  _needed_ and now… now it’s all here in front of him. Waiting for him to accept it.

“Dean?”

And then there’s the chill that runs up Dean’s spine just hearing that voice. All senses heightened to ensure he takes in everything Cas is doing. His stance, his hair, his head tilt,  _his eyes_ … everything. He wants it all.

“Everything okay?” Walking slowly over to him, Cas places the back of his hand to Dean’s forehead. “You feel alright.” Cas’ expression screams concern but all Dean can do is feel a warmth spread through his chest. And it hits him. He deserves this. For all he’s done, all the shit hes been through. Dean deserves his angel. 

That’s all he needs.

Taking Cas’ hand in his and entwining their fingers, Dean offers a small smile, looking into piercing blue eyes. “Yeah Cas… I’m good. Really good.” And he is. He might not be tomorrow or next week but right now… He’s feelin’ pretty damn awesome. That’s all that matters.


End file.
